Monday, December 10, 2018

“Self-Confidence” (Grace Note #61)




“Self-Confidence” (Grace Note #61) 

Written by Gary L. Clendenon, December 6-10, 2018


I recently came across this text—I Corinthians 10:12—in my weekly Bible study from The Message Bible. It inspired the thoughts that follow:

“Forget about self-confidence; ... Cultivate God-confidence.”

Given the current focus on SELF in our society today, this verse is a challenging and thought-provoking text! As a Christian, I am to be led by a different philosophical perspective, as taught by Jesus and the Bible. There is a huge tension in the Bible created by all the texts encouraging us not to be “selfish” which goes against our natural desires as humans to want everything to go our way. Here is an excellent example of many texts that give this message:

“Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others better than yourselves. Don’t look out for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too.” (Philippians 2:3-4)

So, obviously, it is very clear from the Bible that being selfish is to be avoided at all cost! But, is there a difference between self-confidence and selfishness? Is the Bible teaching us that self-confidence is wrong or bad?

Here’s my take, but first let me remind you of “The Pendulum Effect” (a.k.a. “The Pendulum Law”) discovered in 1602 by Galileo. According to Dictionary.com, “the theory holding that trends in culture, politics, etc., tend to swing back and forth between two opposite extremes.” The “etc.” here, I believe, also holds true for religion and our personal lives.

There was a period of history called “The Dark Ages” (a.k.a. “The Middle Ages”). For our purposes, we will look at the Church and Religion during this time before the Reformation was started by Martin Luther in the 16th century. One of the reasons, this period was called “The Dark Ages” was because this was the time before the Bible was available for all humans to read.

The main Church of this time was the Catholic Church and they held the only Bibles and they were in Latin, so the people were completely dependent on the Priests of the Church for their Biblical understanding. It was during this period of time—and after—that the Church and its Priests and Theologians promulgated the teaching that is now called “Worm Theology”, which was based on several texts in the Bible that state that we are worms in relationship to God.

I am strongly positing that “Worm Theology” is one of the extreme ends of a pendulum swing for religious belief, and that this belief leads us to an erroneous understanding of the “Self”. I am arguing that it is this belief that has kept us from a true and proper understanding of the “Self”. I also believe that it is our society’s backlash against this “Worm Theology” that has led us to our current over-focus on the Self—the other end of this pendulum’s swing!

The teachings of early Christians, and those who perpetuate this teaching today—that we are worms and there is nothing good in us—went too far! Yes, those statements are in the Bible for a good reason—we do tend to fall easily for the temptations of Selfishness and Pride, so we must be kept in check with Humility and Balance as we relate to our Real Worth and Value. In comparison to the unimaginable awesomeness of GOD, there can be no doubt the “worm” is a good metaphor. But wait, there’s more….

Dale Fincher, in an excellent blog post entitled “Unworthy, not Worthless” nails the correct perspective on this topic:

...we are worms. Is that the story?

Our Christian vocabulary has confused two very important words and made them one.

Unworthy. Worthless.

These do not mean the same thing. But when we attach them to each other, we end up talking and believing that our unworthiness means our worthlessness.” (1)

Yes, we are “Unworthy” but no we are not “Worthless”. As Christians, we have an advantage over those who don’t believe in God. The Bible is very clear that we as individuals matter to the GOD-head! We are told so in numerous verses.

Unlike Atheists, who must completely go it alone, completely relying on themselves and their own wits and wisdom, we Christians have a GOD who says They have a Plan for our lives, a purpose, and that even when bad times come, they will be—eventually—turned into Good! (Romans 8:28) Our All-Powerful GOD has “got our back” through all of life’s troubles and when we follow His Way, His Teachings, His Rules, blessings are poured out on us and our families.

I know this is true in my life. Even though I have been through some very difficult times and situations, GOD has always met my needs, and sometimes, even my wants. ALWAYS!

Everything we are and have is a gift from GOD—even our every breath. Our strengths, our positives, all from GOD. When we start focusing on these qualities and thinking we are “All that”, that is when we cross the line from a healthy self-confidence to arrogance and pride. It really is such a fine line. I think that is why Paul says “God-confidence” is a much better option to go with.

With God-confidence, we keep a truer perspective and balance, as the focus is not as much on ourselves as it is on what GOD has given us and what GOD is doing through us. And, because GOD is All-Powerful and has our best interest in mind, how could that not be a better confidence??

It is this confidence that says, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” (Phil. 4:13). Notice the healthy balance of self in this statement. Notice that the “I” is strong and confident—without timidness or shame, but yet has the awareness of where that strength and confidence is coming from. This is ideal self-confidence—what Paul calls “God-confidence”—because there is the awesome awareness of the proper place of the Self.

When Christ is in us, there IS something good in us! We are a reflection of Him! Yes, often a poor reflection (“Now we see a dim reflection, as if we were looking into a broken mirror” I Cor. 13:12 NCV/NLV); nevertheless, what good is seen in us is a glint, a glimpse, of the wonderfulness that GOD intended when all was good—“very good” (Gen. 1:31).

The mistake of the “Self” movement is that it encourages us to take full credit for these glimpses of GOD working in us. When this happens, our view of self becomes unbalanced. This is the trap that leads the healthy, balanced self down the slippery slope to Pride, then Arrogance. This is self-confidence detached from God-confidence. Detached from the Source of perfect Wisdom and Strength, we will, without fail, get in over our heads and mess things up! The Bible describes this outcome with these familiar words: “Pride goes before a fall.” We have all experienced this “fall” and know the sting of the Truth of these words.

This topic has reminded me of a list of sayings I have created called “Gary-isms” (2). One of them addresses the false idea of “Worm Theology” that says we ought to consider our “selves” worthless. “Gary-ism #9”:

“You will love your neighbor as yourself. For your neighbor's sake, please learn to love yourself well!”

Jesus reiterated exactly the Old Testament command from God Himself: “Love your neighbor as you love yourself.” (Leviticus 19:18) Jesus said it was the 2nd greatest commandment, so that makes it extremely important for us to pay attention to!

In looking at this command, it is quite clear that there is a thing called “Self-love”. Now, whether that is a healthy self-love or not can be debated, but what matters is that whatever form of self-love we have, it must—per GOD’s command—be extended towards our neighbor.

Now, if we have been deceived by “Worm Theology” and loathe and hate our-“selves” as worthless, then in keeping GOD’s 2nd Greatest (to love others as we love ourselves) it follows that we would also loathe and hate our neighbors! If you think about this, you will realize that it is true! Humans treat and value others the same exact way that they treat and value themselves!

That is why in Gary-ism #9, I say, “For your neighbor's sake, please learn to love yourself well!” It is imperative, I believe that we get a proper, healthy view of ourselves through GOD’s Loving eyes. When we fully experience His view of us as His loved Children, we can have God-confidence knowing that because GOD dwells in us, we are not worms, but valuable vessels of GOD’s Love.

When this happens (because “You can’t give what you don’t have”), we will be able to love others if not well, at least better; thus, to our best efforts, fulfilling the 2nd Greatest Command of GOD. This is my current best understanding of why Paul says “God-confidence” ought to be sought over “self-confidence”. What is your perspective on this verse?







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